2, 6, 14, 16, 23
who tries to make up first? does it work?
Dan, and no – at least, not at the moment. He’s incredibly unwilling to actually articulate that he has made a mistake and regrets it, because that would expose (horror of horror) that he cares about Amy’s feelings, and we can’t have that. As time goes on, and his fuck-ups become more manageable (and routine), I think he would get better at it.
On the rare occasions when Amy cracks first and apologises, Dan enjoys it so much she gets angry with him all over again.
who grieves more when the other is away?
I think Amy consciously – she probably thinks about Dan a lot, what he’d say about whatever was going on, the jokes he’d make, the faces he’d pull – but Dan probably more so overall. As far as the show tells us, Amy is his only emotionally significant relationship, and for all Dan is obnoxiously confident with women, he seems neither able nor inclined to find a replacement for her.
Where this gets a little strange is…I don’t think Dan needs Amy to love him, necessarily, so long as she’s in his life – clearly he prefers to have her tease him and smile at him and blush at his jokes, but he’d much rather haveher spitting with fury at him than donwithout her entirely. But I think that – for all Dan is profoundly shallow – what is far more important to him is having Amy around to love. He’s actually reasonably good at taking care of Amy and getting her to express herself emotionally – so long as no one draws attention to that fact – and I think she provides a crucial outlet for the better quarter of his personality.
He became close to insufferable in season 6 without her presence, and I think it illustrates that Dan is far more dependent on Amy emotionally than she is on him. It’s just that, as with all complex emotions, Dan pining manifested as him being a colossal dick to everyone who had the misfortune to cross his path.
Put it another way – I highly doubt Ben was even remotely surprised when Dan started talking about bringing Amy into BKD. His ‘thing’ for Amy has probably been completely transparent to everyone around him for years now – the only person he’s successfully tricked into thinking he is completely heartless is her.
do either of them have a special item (an article of clothing, a necklace, a book) that they use when they miss the other? if so, what is it? what do they do with it (read, wear, look at, smell)?
Dan has a photo of Amy somewhere on his phone, that he would never look at during the year she was in Nevada, but which he also couldn’t bring himself to delete (for whatever reason). She’s smiling at him in it. Later, when they are properly together, he will have hundreds of photos of her, in all of which she is pulling a face.
I think Amy would very consciously remove any momentoes of Dan from her vicinity, but she definitely misses his smell (the hair and skin products, the cologne, the clean scent of his shirts), and missed it even more when she was will Buddy and kept waking up with someone who smelt wrong. At some point in their relationship Dan will buy her jewellery, and from then on, whenever she looks at it, she thinks of him.
who’s more jealous?
Dan, Dan, DAN.
Amy simply doesn’t have the sense of entitlement to Dan’s attention that fuels true jealousy. She may not like hearing about Jane (or Sophie), but she doesn’t throw a hissy fit because how dare he spend time with someone else? (I find Dan’s jealousy hilarious, but I’m also glad it’s a well the writers have gone too only occasionally – it could so easily tip into uncomfortable territory. As is, I think it has been purposefully used to illustrate Dan’s immaturity, which I think is a wise choice).
Which is one of the aspects of their relationship that I find kind of sad – Amy is clearly very unsure of herself when it comes to Dan, and whether he cares about her or is attracted to her, and that constant fear of rejection is wholly undeserved, because she is a more attractive human being in just about every way, and he would certainly be marrying up if they ever get together.